THANKSGIVING 09'

happy thanksgiving everyone! :)


i know i know....everyone has been bugging, nagging, and even hitting o.O me about updating lol which i thought the last part was unnecessary a bit but its ok haha i've been so busy and caught up with other things.

(as i'm eating my ben&jerry's ice cream CHERRY GARCIA) but i just want to first give thanks to our Lord! He's has freely given us salvation, grace, mercy, wonderful family and friends in our lives. i love how he just loves us each day and wanting to be with his children...it's a beautiful thing... :) it really is.


so..what's been new in my life or going on?! well couple of things.........

1) apple is going great...had some few drama last week at work but everythings settled now thank GOD! ugh i hate fake people..seriously lol i do.

2) i'm saving up for an acoustic guitar...yeapp thats right you heard it right...


martin 000c16tre series... mmmm :) $1800.....



3) i'm also going to save up for an SLR Camera ...now...i've always wanted one ever since i was 16 years old oddly... but i love taking pictures and finally decided to go for one...cannon here i COME! :D



the EOS 50D...$1099....

or

the EOS rebel XSi $699...

4) i miss talking to old friends.....long distance ......


i hope everyone had a good thanksgiving with their family and friends today. here some couple pics i took...not a lot but enough to enjoy them xD








:) till next time.......





sungeun

reFRESH me

it's been awhile since i last blogged here and i've been really wanting to update but had no down time since of work, ministry, and etc but right now i do finally..hehe :)

work has been going great..and loving it! seriously...i enJOY going to work everyday and really look forward working with my co-workers and everything else. it's something i believe God has really not only blessed me with but has put me in a place where i love to be and love to do what i do.


it's been awhile since i got to spend time with the lord not having to feel rushed. i love doing my qts usually in the mornings so my day goes better and what better way to start off your day with the lord?! :D anyways..i've been slacking off lately waking up early and snoozing and after getting ready to work..i have liek 10 min to do my qt since i snoozed my alarm past week and so and felt so rushed. today i woke up at 10..got ready for church (didn't have to be there till 12 for men's ministry meeting..) left home and got into berk around 11:20..and was going to go gordo's for lunch but went to 7 11 instead hah and got some snacks there. arrived at church like at 11:30 and got the txt that my cousin was going to be late and couldnt meet..so after i ate some food i decided to listen to my ipod and read the word on the rug. and can i say...it was beautiful and just awesome. i didn't feel rushed..i spent time reading the word while listening to kari jobe and hillsong united :D ...then praying...then back to reading and praying...and man i didn't feel rushed or anything and it was really amazing. i didn't feel tired throughout the whole day...felt refreshed...filled with joy and smile on my face :)


it is amazing when you really spend time with the lord and not having to rush your moment with him. he speaks to you gently and lovingly. the father who loves and wants to give us more of himself. a friend who is there for us when we're in need of someone. a savior who redeemed us from death cause of our sins. a king who rules over our lives with kindness. its amazing to see what God does and can do in your life. maybe you're going through seasons of hurt, desert, brokeness, joy, love, or whatever it may be....cling onto to the promise of the Lord..of his promise and hold that close to your heart. he wants to give us himself and what more can we ask for? let him reFRESH you and really ask him to take you deeper. thats my prayer for you. :)


let it a good week with the lord.

catch UP. PEACE. FAITH. HOPE. LOVE.

everyone's been asking me..."where have you been sam?" well...i've been working but i do feel MIA foreal...AND to top that off...everyone's going back home this weekend....idk why... :( but i can't wait to see people this weekend...feels like forever i haven't seen anyone cept david, jenny, and pjosh this week to play :)

work is going great. i freaking love it there and all of my team and co-workers. Apple is a different company and not your typical "company" i would say...they focus on team ethics, having care for each other, to grasp the culture of Apple, and really being in an environment where creative people are around each other and being innovative to contribute to the company. its the first and only company i worked for in my past where i can honestly say..everyone is really genuine, chill, laid back, but also hard working and having their head on their shoulders. GOT MY NAME TAG AND BUSINESS CARDS! WHOOOOOO!!

my name tag.. :D


i've been feeling peace of where i am right now in my life...in a good way that is. not content but at peace...there's a difference. being content is feeling okay (not happy nor sad) and not wanting to do anything...being in the situation you are in physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually...however with peace...comes from God and you are filled with joy and thankful around you. where you are with your life with the Lord, your community, your peers, friends, family, relationships, etc. thats where i stand this day and i know peace doesn't last forever and God does disciplines those who He loves..and its always hard to go through pain, suffering, hurt, anger, bitterness, forgiveness, trials, and all these things but when you lay it at the foot of the cross..come running to Jesus and surrendering it to Him...nothing makes him feel more joyful (NOT HAPPY) to see his son or daughter who's hurting running back to the father and saying "help me daddy...i'm not having a good day...week...month...year..(or maybe you are) but i just need you daddy and want you right now. i can't do this on my own and i just need you GOD! come SPEAK to me! come RESCUE me! come RESTORE and REVIVE me!" that's the faith...trust...and heart God desires us to have for him. i feel like im preaching but lol..i pray that THIS speaks to you..if you're reading this and thinking no way..or just whatever...read it over again and let it sink in...maybe you aren't peace where you are right now in your life with relationships...family....friends...school...your walk with the lord...or maybe you are but my question is whether you are or not... "what are you striving for? are you happy where you are right now in life or would you be wanting that joy? what are you going to do with that joy?"

it takes faith for you to be at peace. usually..people think its the opposite but peace doesn't last forever or stands firm...its your faith that does. don't get me wrong..peace is awesome when the God just showers us down with it but without faith you can't have peace. once you develop the faith concept...you can grasp the hope. maybe you tried over and over and over AND OVER again all the time but nothing seems to work out...seems things just gets worse..but i got good news...there's hope for you. there's hope for you when your life hurts the most..hope isn't when you look forward to the future but you trusting it into the hands of our father and knowing that you are in the good hands of our father who tenders us..who loves us unfailingly...when that hope arises...your love comes. your love for the lord tends to arise and gets stronger, bigger, deeper, harder, and you begin to understand what love is with the father. he wants you to be in love with him and not just for him. he designed to know the father..to love the father..and to be WITH the father....


i know this is getting long but i feel this is for YOU...maybe you've been having a hard time..hard life..maybe a awesome life but always that one thing that fails you and not being able to experience the real joy...it's not too late. what are you waiting for? search, ask, and knock my brothers and sisters. be mindful of him..meek after him...seach him and you will find says in jeremiah. God desires to give you joy more than you want it...let me say that again..God desires your joy more than you do.



all of my life in every season
you are still God
i have a reason to sing
i have a reason to worship



..HE'S SEARCHING..KNOCKING..ASKING TO COME INTO YOU..

can you say what?...

random thoughts of the day:


it's getting really cold...i should pull out my jangi jangpan (for all you non-koreans...heating electric blanket) ... :)


looking forward and not looking forward for my core training session this sat and sunday from 9am-6pm... -____- seriously....thats a fml but i am blessed with an amazing job and career ahead of me..so i can't complain...praise GOD!


a lot has been on my mind and heart lately about certain things that i choose not to discuss here for reasons but i just hope that whatever it is ... it's within God's timing and i have to trust that it is...so hard but it's something i'm learning everyday...



lastly...
you wow me....that is all.

destination

started my job with Apple on wednesday filling out paper work and..got the tour of the headquarters at Apple and saw amazing things....things i'm not allowed to share about ;) its a secret...i officially start working and training next monday! i am exciteddddddddd!!



here's something for you to chew on.....


i want to run deeper. i don't want to be in the shallow end in the river that flows into the direction but i want to be in the deep end..swimming in the river currents and having it take me to my DESTINATION. every river has a destination and it will take you there if you're letting to let go and be obedient. the only thing that stands between you and God is your WILL(obedience).

will you go deeper...will you let God take you to your destination??



.time for a new song.



take me deeper to you...

everything IS grace..

this past week.....what a hectic long but yet rewarding week it's been...seriously...


where to start.... :

it was my last week watching my dads office...i'm glad he's coming home tomorrow! i missed him so much! :) and he was so happy to hear about my job i got with apple over the phone and he said "son, good job...i love you my son" (with his korean accent xD)

had my 2nd interview with the District Store Manager of Walnut Creek cause for awhile i will be stationed here..ill explain later on....

LG SF Outing was so much funnnn! we had an awesome time...went to the warf... ate at boudins...then off to ghirardelli square got some ice cream..and went to twin peaks! twin peaks is what made the night and it was so beautiful outside...nice warm cool breeze and beautiful lights...haven't gone there for couple months but going up there with the pppl you love at lw was just heart warming and awesome :)

Apple job story time.......

it's always been a dream for me to work for Google, Adobe, Apple, or big Fortune 5oo companies in my life and always saw myself reaching to my goals and getting there no matter what it took..back in summer last yr of 08 i applied to Apple but never heard from them...after a yr now that passed i applied once again and to Wells Fargo as well....Wells Fargo said we like you but right now we're not hiring unforunately but will keep your resume on file with us and let you know when we will start hiring again for your positions...and i got email that Apple wanted to interview me..i got really excited that morning which was 2 weeks ago and jumped out of bed and emailed the recruiter back (his name is Dustin) and told me to come in on Wednesday the 16th...went in there one of the other managers interviewed me..funny and cool asian girl named Lisa. it went well and we talked for like an hr straight haha and she told me that i would hear back soon....after that i called her on the phone and thanked her once again and emailed Dustin later on that day..


2nd Round process...
it's been almost a week and on monday the 21st Dustin emailed me telling me to come in to meet with the District Store Manager on Wed 23rd...went in there and was put into a group of 8 for group interview....i was like wow...like seriously? lol....but it turned out very well..me and 4 other ppl asked really deep hard questions for the DSM and he loved us hahaha :) .... after an hr of asking questions he ended saying it was nice meeting you all and you all hear back from me on friday the 25th...everyone else walked through the other side of the plaza and i walked with michael...i thanked him..shook his hand and asked for his contact info and he said SURE SAM my pleasure and it was very nice meeting you as well..you're very smart and a thinker..we need more ppl like you :) (inside that made me feel good haha) then we talked about korean bbq haha which was cool...emailed him later that day and called him to thank him as well...


3rd Round process....
on friday lisa called me to ask if it was cool for me to come meet the Marketing Director of California and i said sure and 9am -_____- i said ok! of course....i met with Leland and i was scared this guy reports to Steve Jobs lol directly that is....but he was very chill, awesome, smart, thinker, and very very funny....it was me and 4 other people that made it this far out of 120 something applicants..!!!!! my goodness...so we sat outside infront of starbucks and he was sharing about his heart for Apple and this team and etc...for like 2 hrs straight and it was goood getting to talk with each other and etc and at the end he said "im excited to have you guys come on board with us" inside my mind i was confused...i didn't know if he meant for all 5 of us or just some? was confused but nonetheless he said this is it...after this Dustin will call u you guys to make an offer and etc....thanked him and went home...
went home to change then grabbed lunch with cliff but before he got off for lunch i was in the store and talking to Dustin for the first time and he was a really cool guy..awesome guy who looks like wolverine though hahahaha...he said "sam...let me just tell you right now...*he wispers* offf the record...you're in bro :)" i was like "in as in .... officially hired in??!!!!" and dustin goes "mmhmmmm :) congratulations!" i just wanted to hug him there lol but yeah i was so happy and etc made my year..seriously


for apple...im in a new division of Marketing and Strategic Planning&Developing...i'm the Project Manager for now..till i get promoted later on...they're going to make me travel through diff Apple Stores in Norcal to help plan and develop more effectively to market the products more meaning through visually, layouts, and etc and to talk it out with store managers and executive directors from the corporate office....and after that about 1-2 yrs they will have my OWN OFFICE for me ready :) ahhh i can't wait!!



long entry i know but i tried to condensed it as much as i could...but this is all grace. this is not mine nor it belongs to me...everything i have is a blessing and it belongs to God ultimately..and thank you dad for providing me with this career and the job. you are good and so goood to us...you know our needs when the timing is right. i thank you so much and just want to bless the church now and friends and family more now :)


everything we have is grace...that's what its all about..its all bout him and nothing else.



.EVERYTHING IS GRACE.

just thoughts

going to be posting random thoughts here and there...sorry if i jump all over the place hahaha:


i love when i come to Starbucks order my passion iced tea lemonade with 6 pumps of raspberry syrup...its so good and get the chocolate croissant or the morning bun. it makes me happy haha cause im a fatty


today is my final interview process for Apple so can't wait for that....been anticipating for it but its all in Gods hands...seriously i gave it to Him and if it's HIS will to get it then praise God...if not still..praise God!!


lately i feel out of place..why is that? i mean i let the past go and really moved on from who i was from the past and try to be loving, kind, and bring laughter into people's lives but yet i feel out of place? what do i mean here..? i'm not going to be vulnerable on here because i need to be wise with what i say but it hurts when you hear things about you that aren't true in a group where its suppose to be a COMMUNITY not some gossip, lies, half truth community. that's not community. whether its something big OR small or even both...you don't do that..and that's not what church is about. you thought they care about you or so they "say" they do...actions speak louder than words and you know when someone can be fake or whatever. i'm sick and tired of it .... really i want to rip their heads off but HAHAHA but you know what...whatever i know who i am and God knows and that's whats most important to me and i am who i am because God made me this way


this old harabolgee...came into my dads office moments ago and we were talking about my grandfather...i got really vulnerable haha and we were just talking about how he was back in the days and how he really cared for my dad..and yes we talked in korean i suck...like no joke lol but i understood everything so praise God for that at least lol...how he use to bring my dad sandwhiches every morning for lunch for my dad in the office...how he use to carry me when i was tired and weak..how he loved the lord so much and gave selflessly..whenever i talk about my grandpa i tend to get emotional and teary because i miss him so much and i was just smiling the same time as i was tearing up but i know he's in a better place of course and just miss him...


there are people who i need to catch up with but i find it so hard because we're all so busy...we all have different schedules and have our own lives right? i want to but yet i don't want to bother them...but they say the samething to me hahaha but i tell them i'm always willing to talk and listen :) but i guess people just too busy...and it sucks since you miss them but got to keep them close to your heart always :D thats most important thing..


i'm about to start taking vocal lessons and guitar lessons soon...i want to go to the next level with what God has blessed me with because ultimately it's his and i want to give him back so much more .... i've been wrestling with it..financially its going to hurt...but its something i love doing..music is one of my passion and i'm going to keep going with it till i die! haha :)


that's all for now till next time...


oh Lord, you're beautiful.

the blessed weekend!

where to start...before i left for berk on friday...my charger came in the mail for my new camera!! :) which made my day even better hahaha and was being a cam whore taking pics...but will upload them later on....



what a weekend......all 76 of us went to go river rafting for our fall retreat and it was just awesome. i got to hang out with the fellas and the girls and really get to know them on a deeper level rather than just surface which was good and i see how God just cherishes each one of them :)

got there on friday night..we had night service..it was good hearing joe hyung speak again..i missed it :) and he spoke on the blessing with adam and eve...since our theme this yr is Blessed. its funny how God just placed the forbidden fruit in the middle where everything else was also good around that and how it was a blessing from God to be blessed and be a blessing in the world..to have anything in the world and to concur it but yet they failed to see that and still wanted that fruit..and God has called us to rule over this world in His name for His glory. He wants us to be the best that we are so we can go out and be that blessing He called us to be! what a challenge but yet a blessing..

next day we woke up early and got breakfast..then had morning service..and had some ice breakers hahaha which the guys won!! YEEEEEAHH BOY!! hahaha -___- anyways..then ate lunch and got ready to raft!! in our boat was me, james, mike, karen, tae-sun, dan..and our guide which i forgot his name :( but it was the best boat..seriously we all had a good time and it was fun...we jumped off from this cliff off of a rock...it didn't look too high from the bottom but when you get to the top...oh my ... i freaked out like crazy..i had to let like 3 other ppl go ahead of me first since i couldn't do it at the moment lol but i did haha :) rafted more and more and more..got back to the site...showered and ate dinner and had night service..i really loved last night since i got to talk to people who i didn't know and really got to know them and share my life with them, stories and MORE STORIES LOL i wish i could share more but ppl had to sleep..

woke up at 5:40 am...-_______- cause the worship team had to go early and set up but it felt nice for me waking up early and really enjoying the silent nature haha and had lisa, paula, janice, and sally in my car. it was a good car ride :) got to know them a lot more and was funny sharing stories..LOL...dropped them off and went to church to set up and sound check..i rushed home to shower and get ready and also to pick up pair of shoes since i took black chucks in the raft now they're all nasty and smelly haha..had service which was a BLESSING another great message from joe hyung and ministry time went very well i thought. God is just awesome :)


long update...i know...but i love to share what i experienced. not even words can describe how much more i feel excited and passionate and today when i got home and settled down...i picked up my guitar and never i felt being this passionate before of just playing more and more and wanting to do song writing non-stop..i believe God has refreshed my desire which i've been longing all my life hehe.. :)
and i got to talk to my dad on the phone from korea...going to translate from korean to english...

dad: hows my son doing?!?!
me: im doing well appa..i miss you a lot..how are you ??
dad: im doing well..we won 3 games in a row..now we're climbing up a mountain..8 hrs of full climbing...and i want to die now..
HAHAHAHA so funny... :D




be blessed...but more than that...be a blessing.

the weeeeeekeeeennnd! :D

i am soooooo glad it's the weekend! been a long week working but finally the weekend is here and can't wait! i'm sitting here eating cereal...doing laundry...some packing...about to go gym in a little bit and finish packing for our river rafting retreat! YEAAAAHHH YUHHH!! last time i went with pt and our old yg was back in 2004 or 05...so long ago haha but i'm glad we're going again and this time with the family who i love and cherish the most...L W baby! and joe oh hyung is speaking!! wooooot! :D


i got this digital camera Casio Exilim EX-S600 for free this week :) from one of my dad's clients gave it to me and i didn't know what to do...he said dont worry just a little thank you from me to you i was like so humbled since i've always wanted one but never reeally wanted one at the same time since i want a SLR camera stilL! but praise God! so i ordered the charger through amazon EXPEDITED shipping but still hasn't come in the mail..i ordered it on monday so i can take pics with the camera but still hasn't come ... sigh.... owell :\


i've downloaded Send It On by jonas brothers, miley cyrus, salena gomez, and demi lovato.....i love this song hahahahaha...its a secular song but i love the chorus where it talks about shining the light and sending that on and forth....but good song hahaha ...


i miss my dad a lot and can't wait for him to come back from korea..miss my brothers...miss my grandpa...grandma...whole family, friends....idk why right now but i just miss everyone hahaha but most of all i miss you Lord. and i can tell that you want to tell me that you've missed me for a long time and i want more God...more and more...take me deeper with you...take me...


weekend....here i come...

dadddyy

this morning...my dad left for Korea to play in a soccer tournament with his team for week and a half...i rode the bart with him since i have to watch over his office for him til he returns and it was a goood dad and son time..we were laughing, laughing, and even more laughing at jokes and stupid silly things that only me and my dad understands..and everything.

i miss him already...i wish he was here haha but watching his office wasn't bad since i'm use to running it before..he called me before he took off and said to me to make sure that i take care of hannah and mom at the house and make sure to always help mom and your brothers and sister..and we both said i love you and hung up. :) then some of his clients came in and was so busy for couple hours and i finally checked my phone and i saw txt from him saying "sam....i am taking off now...i love you so much my son..be good. i love you" and i started to tear up because when i read that i could imagine his voice and how he would say it so deeply with a smile on his face...even know i want to cry hahaha yeah i know i'm sappy but i dont care lol..

at least i get to talk to him when i wake up tomorrow morning :D and it hit me when i rode the bart back home....even though God never leaves us...he still says to us..he misses us..he loves us..he wants us..simple yet so deep.


:)

the blessing of laughter

today's message was exactly what i needed to hear....thank you daddy :)


i want to fall in love with laughter again....i want to laugh again...i want that everlasting endless joy once again....

i need YOU...come through me day and night...i am your beloved and you call me your own....i am yours forever...i belong to YOU


take me....find me...search for you...i want to laugh once again... :)



..everything is grace...

.....

.....i don't know anymore...

i need a vacation and want to get out of here.........

i think it's time for a change



...time will only tell...

T0-day..

today is one of those days where you didn't really look forward to anything but it just comes out totally unexpectedly different..i had a interview with Apple at noon and all i can say the recruiter and i had a great time chit chatting away for about an hr. haha..i told her stories of me of why people think i'm interesting and unique...it went very well and was a success thank you JESUS! :D

after went to the mall with cliff to grab lunch at at chipotle...then did some window shopping...i was going to buy something at heritage but i decided not to and use my money wisely so i didn't...although i really wanted that jacket i refused to not buying it heh..then did more window shopping and went home..

got home and shared the wonderful news to my mom and sis haha and when i got home suprisingly my aunt (sampu's mom) and my grandmother was there waiting for me :) as soon as i came to give my grandmother a hug she began to cry since she missed me so much since she's still recovering from her cancer and sickness and i cried with her haha but it was a beautiful moment for the both of us..after that...went to the gym...came back home..chilled for couple hrs..showered then went to grab yogurtland with cliff. hahaha man we crack ourselves up....after came back home and here i am just updating....this is where i am today...


things have been changing lately...i'm just not use to it..but change is good but its a hard thing to grasp especially if things just change all of a sudden? :\ idk what i'm saying here...lol....i don't want to say everything here since it is pretty personal but yeah...i do miss how it was but things change...people change....we all change..don't we??? who know's...maybe its for the better..or maybe it's not....only time will tell.



.


miss you grandpa...
wish you were here so you could've seen me graduate in july..and tell you about my interview today! D; miss you.

i need a title.....

i wrote this song while jamming at Crystal Church (in Texas) on the night we did a praise night before their retreat with a melody....then i wrote the verse, chorus, and bridge at the retreat....and just yesterday at home...i completed this song with verse 2, 3, and 4...for some reason i felt like God was telling me all i want is you and just you alone...i don't need anything else from you but your heart ..so can i have it? and many times i think we try so hard to do everything and give everything at once..which is hard if you think about it..but at times, its just all about simplicity. Simplicity to worship, simplicity to love the Lord, and simplicity to write and sing out songs to the Lord. and this is what this song is all about..simplicity. acknowledging what Jesus did for us and really laying down and say i need you...i want you more than this world can offer to me..i want to love you and go deeper.


i'm going to try to work on the recording next couple weeks for this song and try to make it as good as possible... :) hope you guys enjoy it! it's a mid tempo song like Everlasting God..




Verse 1:
At the cross, where you laid down Your life for me
where I've been set free, I've been set free

Verse 2:
Your love is pure and has no other bounds
love so amazing, love so amazing

Chorus:
Lord, I give You everything
Lord, I give You all of me
take me to that place of love and rest
where my soul cries out for more

Verse 3:
More precious than gold, more precious than silver
You are all I want, You are all I need

Verse 4:
Lord, I long for more of You in me
So come and empty me, come and empty me

Bridge:
Jesus, come and fill my heart up once again
let my life be filled with endless joy


hope this song speaks out to you...whatever you may be going through.. always look unto Him for strength and give Him your all. all He wants is your heart and nothing else :D


and i still need a title for this song....


sam.cho

in the morning..

for the first time in 2 weeks...i was able to sleep well lol and i feel really good and i missed waking up early :D most people don't like waking up early but i do most of the times but love sleeping in...hahaha i don't know what i'm saying..anyways...

woke up this morning around 5:40am and drove to one of my fav places i go to which is about a 20 min drive but at this point i didn't care.....then after i went back home and slept for like 2 hours :D....took a picture before sunrise (NOTE: i did some lightroom effects :p)


but i love this picture...why? i sat there in silence and really able to scope out the view and enjoying the scenery and imaging what my life would be like in 4-5 yrs from now..would i still be here in bay area? would i move? what would happen and etc...took my guitar with me...i take it almost everywhere i go :) and started to write a song and hopefully finish soon....lots of things running in my head but i know God is good and His plans are for me.


i will never forget what this lady told me before...
"sam.......doing what you want to do and doing what God has in plan for you are two different things. you may do what you want but it may not be what God wants you to do or be even though it sounds amazing or great...always make sure that you do everything of what God has planned for you in your life.."


miss you grandpa : )


sungeun

waiting..

i always find it amazing when you're just sitting and waiting for the Lord to speak and you expect for Him to come like a fire from the heavens or heavy wind that rushes down into your heart or even a big voice but i love what King David writes here in...

Psalms 46:10
"Be still and know that I am God"


i think many of us tend to expect God to move in or speak to us like fire, wind, or something crazy but sometimes...He wants us to just be silent here and wait for Him like a gentle whisper..i want that in my life..more and more..i need that more and more..


waiting here in the silence for You......come and fill me..overflow my cup with Your waters that springs into life..


...i am waiting...

update?!

time to update! :D i know it's been about what..almost about 5 months now but updates are to come very soon..i promise :)

- sungeun

UPDATE.......

wow..i haven't updated this blog for such a long time now...it's been awhile! yes i know! idk if people still read my blogs or will ever cause i don't update anymore but i promised myself i would now! HAHAHA so all you faithful bloggers...please do come back :)

anyways, i've been so busy and caught up with my last quarter of school.....my schedule is SOOO crazy and idk even know how i am doing this but whatever, it's my last quater and can't complain and God is good :) so mon-thurs i have 8am-10am class, mon&wed only i have 8-10pm class, then 1 online class...........kinda crazy but it's duABLE! yesterday was the most craziest day ever.....so like i woke up at 720 in the morning...took a quick shower, got ready for school, went to school (i love going to school first week of classes...idk why..its funny to see people waiting in line getting mad from their schedules and i just walk by and i smile and i laugh to myself and say oh God, you are goooood) anyways...so went into my first and only class in the morning...teacher is REALLY CHILL AND AWESOME..we all love him and he got some jokes too ....then i got called by the school president to come into her office and have a chit chat with her......she told me how she loves me and how she wants the best for me and always looks out for me and with the rest of all the staff at school...which i think is kinda weird cause they always like treat me like some king hahahaha like seriously...free food...drinks...get to sneak into their cool faculty lounges and watch some tv if i ever wanted to....idk they're ALL really nice and cool with me so thats good...but she told me i have to figure out my financial status before i continue school....so she sent me home :( then got some $$ to make some payments...came back to school around 11 made half of the payment, talked with my financial advisor and talked about almost an hr.....went back home to grab my parents 2008 taxes...grabbed lunch..ate...then came back to school...dropped off my parents taxes for 08 and in the mean time...i went to go challenge out of one my classes i didn't want to take (WHICH I PASSED...PTL! :D !) which took 2 hours...by this time...i am annoyed and tired haha but felt good passing the challenge exam..didn't get any pel grant money from my fasfa :( but its okay.. we worked things out and the president of my school told me to come back for that night class (which i didn't go to..HAH!) and told me the staff and all the teachers, counselors, employers wanted me to come to the faculty lounge and play some guitar for them some time...so i said hahaha okay i will! THEN...came back home...took a 3 hr nap and woke up around 7pmish....felt like CRAP and HOT cause the weather...ate dinner and didn't go to my night class...but its okay the teacher emailed me saying we missed you but don't worry...first week of classes are okay :) ... then went to the gym and yeah.....

so busy busy busy!! my goodness...but i sit here and think and say T H AN K Y O U L O R D!! You ARE GOOD! He's so faithful :) i can't wait till i graduate...it's going to feel so great...had coaching earlier today with my coachee who i loveeeee DAVID LIU! YEAH YUH!! our sessions been so awesome....crying, sharing struggles, really enjoying our talks, and fellowship...man God is GOOD!!

i've been having my grandpa in my dreams again...i miss him so much and i'm going to visit his grave soon...been holding off because idk...i get very very emotional when i think about him cause i miss him....but i know he's with daddy :) and probably dancing with Him, laughing, smiling, and watching over me with daddy :) miss you harahbohjee.....

playing back on electric feels soooooo goooood....been 2 semesters since i haven't played but feeels good to be back on electric but i do miss playing and jammin on the drums hehe...

the recording on sunday for our 2nd living water project....hahaha! MAN OH MAN...i am not made for singing hahahaha that's all i can say but its okay since it was just a demo that we're going to do be doing so the real artists can do our parts ahaha but yeah i'm reallly reallly reallllllllly exciteddddd for this project! it's going to be awesome...we got some amazing songs for this album!!


i think that's it for now...till next time (probably this week later on)



oh and working on a new song.. :D

Sing To Him A New Song

so it's been awhile and everyone been asking me how come you don't blog?! well to be HONEST, i've been busy with school and graduation coming up, finals coming up, family, friends, finalizing songs and editing them, recording new songs, writing new songs, learning new stuff on the guitar, going out to berk to the people who i love the most :D, umm...washing dishes, doing laundry....hahaha i'm just giving a whole spiel ... but also been resting a lot in the Lord which is good and awesome. :D

i titled this entry dedicating to one of my most recent songs i'm currently working on. it all started when i had a dream last week around mid week....in my dream was Joel Houston...if you don't know who he is...he's the hillsong worship pastor/leader and also for united live team....you probably see him on tours, cds, dvds, what not, anyways it was just me and him inside this beautiful house that was very pretty...normally houses are nice, big, amazing, but this house the inside was just PRETTY! we were sitting on the couch and we were just sharing what God's been doing in our lives, sharing each other's songs we wrote and currently writing, talk about living water and hillsong church! haha and guitar stuff and etc. :) but the whole time as i was hanging out with him and talking to him, it didn't feel like he was Joel. it felt like Jesus. then Joel says "hey sammayyy (with Australian accent LOL)... show me a song" so i said okay so i did and he said "no no..do something new...show me something new...sing to me something NEW" and for a moment i paused and didn't know what to do then joel says to me "just sing a new song from your heart. you never sing or rather yet people never sing about songs from their lips..just sing something new from your heart sam" so i did......i woke up from that dream after i played a song and was inspired and challenged and memorized the exact melody from the dream. what a crazy dream but awesome. felt very REFRESHING! so yes this is my most recent song i am going to be working on and i'm excited where God leads me through it. don't have a title for it yet but i'm sure God will speak :)

i think many times many of us think singing him a new song doesn't mean just by songs, but its your heart. your attitude. your walk with the Lord. God wants your soul to cry out to Him for more and more and more...so much more that you can't get ENOUGH of it! i encourage you all to sing unto Him a new song. doesn't have to be a song, it can be prayer, words, serving, worshiping, or whatever it maybe how you want to do it...just go for it and let it ring out from your heart to your soul to the Lord

i love what Darlene Zschech says in the God He Reigns DVD during rehearsals and seminars....she says "these songs...what we write or other artist and songwriters write aren't just songs....they are meant to be lived in our lives. before we sing these songs they must be lived. We must be living in and out through and through these songs before they are sung"

if you guys have a favorite worship song or whatever it maybe to connect with the Lord somehow or way, i encourage you to live it before it is sung. :) sing to Him a new song

Beautiful

i sat here today at my house in the living room..listening to this new album of Kari Jobe on repeat ever since Jenny noona sent it to me and i love her album. so amazing...just in case if you didn't know who she is, she wrote the song The More I Seek You that i always sing at large group now hahaha. :p

anyways, i sat here and was looking out through the window the beautiful nature of God. everything is green, living, healthy, looking at birds come and just playing w/each other, staring into the bright blue sky, nice summer breeze feel outside, looking at people just enjoying themselves...what a beautiful thing to see and look at what daddy made :D

this song actually brought me to my knees and my soul just standing still and crying out to Him that He IS beautiful and Holy! hope you guys enjoy the song and i pray it will bless your heart as it did to me


this is the youtube video:
Gateway Worship 2008 - Kari Jobe


Kari Jobe - Beautiful

Verse 1:
Here before Your altar
I am letting go of all I need
Of every motive, every burden
Everything that's of myself

Pre-Chorus:
And I just wanna wait on You, my God
I just wanna dwell on who You are

Chorus:
Beautiful, Beautiful
Oh, I am lost for more to say
Beautiful, Beautiful
Oh Lord You're beautiful to me

Verse 2:
Here in Your presence
I am not afraid of brokenness
To wash Your humble feet with tears
I would be poured out 'till there's nothing left

Bridge:
Holy, Holy, Holy You, You Are
Holy, Holy, Holy You, You Are
Holy, Holy, Holy You, You Are
Holy, Holy, Holy You, You Are

Grandpa...Visit Again Soon :)

waking up in the middle of the nights...crying and realizing that he's no longer here with me...i miss him so much...i wish i could just give him a big hug and kiss him on the cheek like i use to and hold onto his hands...

i had a dream about him couple nights ago and in my dream, i saw him with my own eyes but in my dream i knew he wasn't alive but there i saw him....in his suit at church and sitting next to my grandma in service..after i see him talking and enjoying being next to his friends and grandma...i wanted to go up and say hi but was too scared? i followed him outside and seemed he was going to go fade away like you see in movies in the bright sun light....i ran to him and grabbed his hand by faith that if he was really there....i grabbed it and he turned around...he looked into my eyes and said hi sungeun. how are you? i miss you so much and i love you very much with a big smile on his face like this.. :D i couldn't help but to cry and he told me not to cry and that he'll see me again and check up on me sometime soon....i asked if he could stay with me just a little longer....i cried and begged to him..he wiped the tears and my boogers haha and he said i love you sungeun and be good and take care of family for me...and he left...

i woke up crying so much that night and i couldn't help but to just get up, sit up and cry out to Daddy...i got to spend time with Him and cast all of my cares unto Him because His burden is light and His yoke is easy. i needed healing and just peace in my heart...i didn't fall asleep till 7am that morning...but i know that just in that dream...He covers me with his love and grace and I am His child and I belong to Him. We all do. We are His sons and daughters..to be His hands and feet.


i will see you in heaven grandpa....i know you're probably dancing and enjoying time with DADDY up there :) can you give DADDY a big hug for me? :D i miss you...i'm graduating soon and wish you could have been there but i know you're watching me...i love you grandpa...and visit me soon again :*)
<3> sungeun

The More I Seek You

i fell in love with this song the first time when i heard jenny noona sing it at church and i just love these lyrics...such a simple song but with deep meaning and life into it. as i sat here this week in my bed about the lyrics, i just cried out to the Lord asking for more and more and more of Him. i want more of Him so that i will never thirst again and be satisfied with His love. here are the lyrics:

The More I Seek You

The more I seek You
The more I find You
The more I find You
The more I love you

I wanna sit at your feet
Drink from the cup in your hand
Lay back against you and breathe
Feel your heartbeat
This love is so deep
It's more I can stand
I melt at in your peace
It's overwhelming

Watch the clip here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U3GijrnfStk



Other random facts this week:

* i am an ADDICT OF BLOCKLES..seriously this game is now my life hahahaha...sigh but it's so fun and i always dream about it :D

* got sick this week but i feel God healing me! Praise God! :D

* i wish i could learn piano.....



Father, let this be my lifestyle. i want to seek YOU more, go deeper with You daddy, hold me close to you so i can feel your loving heartbeat, i can only imagine how much joy it brings to You when we cry out to You and askin for more of your love, your love is so pure and holy, it's majestic and brings me peace to my knees, take us deeper with You daddy, we want more, we need more of You....

.AMEN.

Who Am I With Brokeness?

coming back from young adult retreat was such a blessing for me personally. God renewed hearts, spoke with such life and truth, reconciled relationships, and most of all knowing that we belong to Him. during the prayer time i couldn't help but just to simply cry out to the Lord, not seeking for attention but just keeping it between me and daddy. i've been wrestling with something for awhile now and it was eating me away slowly, each day and night i found myself more depressed, more hurt, more confused, more lonely, and more broken most of all. i finally gave it to the Lord and i knew i couldn't carry on with it anymore in my heart. i wanted to bring it up the feet of Jesus and simply ask Him to carry me on His shoulders, wrap me in His loving arms that embraces, and be with Him.

it's been hard because i am getting what i asked for from the Lord which is to trust in Him more and going deeper but also at the same time feeling like your closest friends don't really have the same care, love, or respect for you anymore. hearing rumors, false lies, and being slandered and that affecting not only me but my friends was the biggest hurt that i've had to deal with. sometimes i ask "GOD! FATHER! Why?!" it feels so unfair, i lost close people in my life who i never thought i would lose...... i was feeling that for the past couple months now and honestly speaking, it still hurts when i think about it but i know that i don't find my worth through people or what i do, i AM a child of God and nothing will ever stop that or come between that. finding my place within the Lord is always a hard thing but it's something i believe God is taking me through with my character..

listening to PJ's sermon today on rest was just awesome and spoke a lot of truth and conviction into my heart. one thing that stood out of the other things(which were all good points) is that in order for us to rest and taking our sabbath, we must find ourselves or rather yet, our worth through God and not the things that are happening in your life. too much have i gone forcing myself thinking that i could do it on my own..if i just try to forget about certain situations...or finding more things to say but those are lies from the enemy. we find our worth through Jesus because He declared that it was finished when He was on that cross and saw that "it was good".


Daddy, come and make me whole like you, i want to dance with you when you sing over me, i want to be close to you when i feel like when i'm all alone, i want to be carried by you when i fall, you be the water that i thirst and long for, you wipe all of my tears with your gentle hands, you whisper love songs into my ears which brings life, you restore my heart because you are the restorer and the re builder, so daddy, come and take me as your loving bride with your loving grace and mercy. you are quick to love and slow to anger, in my brokenness...you make me whole and you put the pieces back together. daddy, i want to fall in love with you more each day so take me deeper with you..i can never have enough of you, you are so good and your perfect love endures forever. come and take this brokenness away and make me into your image daddy. come.

.AMEN.

His Child

an oldy but still a goody :D


Kathryn Scott - Child of God

With every breath, with every thought
From what is seen, to the deepest part
I offer all that I've come to be
To know Your love fathering me

Father, You're all I need
My soul's sufficiency
My Strength when I am weak
The love that carries me
Your arms enfold me
Till I am only, a child of God

With every step on this journey's walk
And wisdom's songs that the soul has sought
I give myself unreservedly
To know Your love fathering me


whenever you are feeling down, questioning, lost, broken, hurt, or just simply want more of Him, look unto this song for hope and understanding that He calls us His own and we're His child. no matter how big or small the situation or circumstance is, His grace is sufficient for us and He will make us new.

A Promise of Love

today i met up with pj at Starbucks near our house and we talked and shared a lot with each other...i'm really glad that i was able to hear what God wanted me to hear from pj and i feel so much more alive spiritually and challenged in the same way. i'm just really excited what God has in store for me for my future and esp at living water :D

after that i decided to go to school and spend some time there before class started but before doing that i went to a Starbucks near my school and got myself a tall vanilla latte...idk why but i was just in the mood for that vanilla latte..haha while i'm driving back, right in front of me i see a GINORMOUS rainbow! instantly right there and then i was reminded of what God said to Noah that He would never flood the earth again and spare life. whenever i see a rainbow, i'm so drawn into it because i'm reminded that God never forgets His promises to us. He would never abandon us, never fore sake us, He will always carry us when we're lost, pick us up when we fall, quick to love and slow to anger, giving us grace each day, and everything else. He will never forget about His promise to us. He is the Beautiful One :D You're the everlasting love that can quenches our thirst after You, come make us more like You Lord. i want to fall in love with you over and over and over....

i started to write a new song after i got back from my first class and it reminds us that when we're broken coming to the Lord, He lavishes unto us love, love, and LOVE that our deepest cries from our souls will call unto His name and that He makes us whole in His image. I named it after this display name of In My Broken State.


And my soul will cry
Out Your name
that You are God
and that You are love


i am holding onto your promise daddy.

First Blog! :D

FINALLY!!

i gave into this blog thing haha...but i really am looking forward to this because i find myself always running around doing things and never really get to blog it or express myself in a way where i can just simply be me :D so here i am!!

i chose this name because i find it very relevant to me as a person..not saying i'm EMO but just really broken before the Lord. there's been many moments in my life in the past and even now at times where situations come up and i can't do anything but go to God with it and i find myself broken before Him. many think that being broken is ugly, hurts too much that's why we try to avoid it as much as we can, takes too much effort and time, and list goes on and on right..?? but being broken is simply beautiful. why? because, when we're broken before the Lord, He is quick to mend the broken hearted and restore it with His GRACE and LOVE. that's the beauty of being broken, you simply can't do anything but go to God with it.

as it is said and known that we're the clay and He's our potter er. Many times we fall to the floor and we're broken into pieces and no one can put us back except the potter because he is the only one that knows how to put our pieces back together since he made us. In the same way, God works that way in our lives each day. Many don't know, but we're all broken people to God but because of His love for us, He completes and sustains in us the bible tells us :)

there's nothing but just to be simply broken and letting Him take over and take control...it's hard but i know it's something i must give it to Him at all costs and times..


take me deeper....i want more....